4 Life Lessons from Star Wars that Make Us Better Human Beings
Few movie franchises have had a global reach the way Star Wars has. Relatable characters. Incredible saber duels. Fascinating ethical and political dilemmas. Best of all, Star Wars offers incredible life lessons. Here are the best lessons from the Star Wars franchise, which can teach us about our own lives. Lesson #1 — It’s never too late…
When to Say Yes and When to Say No
To say yes or to say no? Should I be a “yes” person, or should I be a “no” person? Life advice can be paradoxical. You can find plenty of advice telling you to say yes in life. Stephen Colbert told a crowd of college graduates to be “yes and” people. Shona Rhimes wrote an…
One of The Best Lessons I Learned From Any Book I’ve Read
Last year I read the book Thinking in Bets by Annie Duke. Duke is a former world champion poker player turned business consultant. Her book discusses the psychological workings within the game of poker and how those lessons can be applied to our everyday lives. One of the reoccurring themes in her books is the…
When Addressing a Problem — Start by Doing Nothing
“Don’t just do something, sit there.” The above quote was uttered by Judson Brewer, who I had the opportunity to listen to (virtually, of course). Brewer is a psychiatrist, author, and professor who’s spent ample time hearing other people discuss their problems. It came as a surprise then that someone who’s a trained psychiatrist telling…
When You Can’t Get Something Out of Your Head — Do This
“How do you release your mind from something you can’t address at this current moment?” A few days ago, a friend approached me with this question. He expressed his desire to live in the present but was having difficulty doing so due to whatever was troubling him. We happen to be sitting on a ski…
8 Things You Should Do Every Day That Take Less Than Ten Minutes
There’s a lot we can do in a day. The problem is life happens and we end up spending hours on only a couple of activities. The main culprits are work and screen time. We work all day; then we pop on a form of entertainment until bedtime. Let’s change that. I’ve listed 8 things…
When You Feel Dread - Ask Yourself This Question
“It’s not as bad you think. It’s all in your head.” This is what my mom told my 5-year-old self before seeing the doctor for a standard shot. Like many young kids, I was fearful of getting a shot. The thought of a stranger injecting a needle into my arm was cause for concern. “It…
How to Recover From a Setback - Hit the Reset Button
“Today is going to be a “#great day!” This is what you shout at the top of your lungs when you get out of bed in the morning. You’ve committed today is YOUR day. You’re going to own your workout, ace your job interview, complete your pending chores, and have an adventurous night with your…
A Non-Scientific Explanation of Nature vs. Nurture Through Pencil Sketches
On the first day of my high school psychology class, my teacher wrote down the following: Nature vs. Nurture. My teacher explained a reoccurring theme in psychology — and throughout numerous other subjects— is the interplay of nature and nurture. As a class, we discussed whether nature or nurture matters more in the development of a person.…
5 Fantastic Quotes From a Book You’ve Likely Never Heard Of
In 1903, a man named George Horace Lorimer wrote a book titled Letters From A Self-Made Merchant To His Son. The book is a collection of letters from a wealthy 19th-century businessman to his 20-something-year-old son. It wasn’t until halfway through the book that I realized the letters were not real. Lorimer had fictionalized the…
What Are You Willing to Give up in a Post-Pandemic World?
COVID-19 has been tough on all of us. We fear for the health of ourselves and our loved ones, unemployment has soared to historical numbers, and many of us have been stuck at home for almost a year now. Amid the struggles, one nice component of a pandemic world has been the gift of time.…
Why We Should Be Polarizing
What does it mean to be polarizing? When we say someone is polarizing, we usually mean people either “love ’em or hate ‘em.” The act of polarization divides people. A polarizing movie is either applauded or lauded. A polarizing political figure is either supported or refuted. A polarizing piece of artwork is either accepted or…
A Selfless Benefit to Suffering
What is the benefit of hardship and suffering? To suffer is to be human, and we all suffer differently. The love of your life breaks your heart. Physical pain destroys your well being. You get cut from the team you worked so hard to make. Where’s the silver lining to our hardships and suffering? We’ve…
We Need to Create More and Consume Less
We live in a consumer society. Eat more, watch more, read more, buy more. More, more, more. Consumerism has become the staple of our livelihoods. Think of a typical day: consume breakfast, consume the news, consume your favorite streaming show. We consume so much; we are referred to by businesses as consumers. Are we human…
If One Book “Changed Your Life,” You’re Doing it Wrong
Ever heard this line before: “This one book changed my life!” Okay, hold your horses. Though you may have heard someone make that claim, it’s quite the statement to make. Did one single book change the whole trajectory of your entire life? I tend to think not, and here’s my controversially bold statement: The person…
Guilt Isn’t Required to Take Responsibility
Guilt and responsibility are two of a kind. These two words are sometimes used interchangeably. But do they mean the same thing? I think not. Understanding the difference between guilt and responsibility can go a long way towards greater accountability. Is it possible to take responsibility without feeling guilt? Is guilt required to assume responsibility?…
Why Discipline Is the Key to Freedom
What does it mean to be free? There’s this notion being free is being able to do whatever it is you want to do. Wake up when you want. Eat what you want. Say whatever you want. Be whoever you want. This couldn’t be farther from the truth. If you believe in freedom as doing whatever…
Some Thank You’s Mean More Than Others
Saying “thank you” is something we say to people throughout our days. We thank loved ones, friends, colleagues, and strangers. We think of thanking people as a simple concept. When someone does something for you, you thank that person. After thinking deeply about the meaning of “thank you’s,” I’ve come to realize not all thank…
5 Most Influential Books I Read in 2020 (And 49 Other Book Reviews)
At the beginning of 2020 I set a goal to read 12 books. I thought one book a month was beyond reasonable. If I had known the year we were going to have, I would have quadrupled my reading goal. With normal obligations down the drain, I was allotted ample time to read. The result…
Avoid Extreme Language
What’s wrong with the following statements? “Today is the worst day of my life”“Marcus is my best friend”“You never listen to me”“I’m always right”“I love taking the subway”“I hate Harry Potter” Each one of these statements uses extreme language. Things are either the best or the worst. We either love or hate people. I either always do something or never do something. Is there any between? Is…
Shut Up and Listen – 5 Strategies to Stop Interrupting People
“Stop interrupting me!” We hear this complaint all too often. Humans are social creatures, yet many of us (especially men) aren’t the best at letting others talk. Over and over again, we’ve been told the ability to listen is paramount. Great, so shut up and let the other person talk. Great job! In reality, it’s…
The Paradox of Rest
The ability to rest is crucial to our well-being. We tend to think of resting as a physical act. Lie down on the couch and watch TV all afternoon. Take a 3-hour afternoon nap. Sleep in on the weekends, only to wake up once lunch is being served. We assume the more physical rest we…
5 Unconventional Things to Be Grateful For
Earlier this year, I started keeping a gratitude journal. Before going to sleep, I would write down three things I was grateful for. I found myself practicing gratitude for the same two things: Health and family. I felt like a broken record when it came to my gratitude practice. While it’s fantastic to be grateful…
Your Life Is an Experiment
There are plenty of metaphors for life. You may have heard one of the following: Life is a gameLife is a stageLife is a dance There’s merit to each of the above metaphors, but there’s one metaphor for life that doesn’t get enough love. Life is an experimen Don’t worry, no bunsen burner or lab…
Why TED Talks Are Destroying Us
TED Talks have become the epicenter for great ideas. Influencers from all walks of life stand on a stage and deliver a 5–20 minute talk about a subject ranging from psychology, education, productivity, relationships, business, among other topics. Watch a few videos and you’ll feel enlightened. What a professor at a research institution spent years…
Why Having a Positive Attitude Isn’t Enough
Have a positive attitude! We hear this advice all the time. Have a positive attitude and things will work out. Unfortunately life isn’t that simple. Our lives are filled with heartbreaks, losses, failures, and setbacks. There has to be more we can do than prop up the ideal of a positive attitude. I’m not opposed…
The Relationships With Your Smartphone
What kind of relationship do you have with your smartphone? I’ve been asking myself this question all the time since watching The Social Dilemma. If you haven’t seen it, definitely watch it. If you have seen it, then you know by the end of the movie you’re ready to delete all social media and destroy…
3 Things Not To Do When Apologizing
We all make mistakes. Unfortunately some of those mistakes can hurt another person. We’ve been taught the right thing to do in these circumstances is apologize. While it’s all dandy and nice to apologize, where we can miss the boat is how to go about apologizing to another human being. You may have had the…
4 Reasons You Should Be Sports Literate
Let’s talk sports! If you’re not into sports don’t stop reading just yet. This post is designed specifically for you (but sports fans by all means please read on.) Every person should have a respectable knowledge of sports. Specifically one should know the results of big games and be able to list the major players…
How To Truly Get To Know Somebody
It’s hard to get to know people. Just when we think we’ve got somebody figured out, time and time again we are pleasantly surprised. A person we thought wasn’t interesting turned out to be extremely dynamic. Conversely, those we thought to be fascinating turned out to be less than extraordinary. What was the disconnect? What…
3 Ways To Be Less Defensive
Humans are protective creatures. When someone calls us out on a belief, our first instinct is to become defensive. We end up alienating those who have challenged or questioned our beliefs. Let’s imagine as a child you were taught that people get what they deserve, no matter the circumstance (also known as the just-world theory).…
What To Do When There’s Nothing To Do
In previous posts, I’ve written much about the importance of planning your day. I’ve discussed why to plan your day in minutes, how to optimally time block, and how to differentiate between urgent and important tasks. While it’s wonderful to plan the perfect day, in reality there are moments in our days in which nothing…
Mindfulness for Westerners
The practice of mindfulness, which is defined as an active and open attention to the present*, has become fully immersed in the Western world. Many Westerners struggle with the concept of mindfulness. Imagine how many Westerners would interpret the following quote from the book The Power of Now: “At the deepest Level of Being, you…
One-Thing-at-a-Time-Fallacy
Your alarm goes off and it’s 7am. You shut your eyes for “just a few more seconds”, only to wake up and now it’s 7:30am. Like a sprinter at the sound of a gun, you dash to the kitchen to cook up the fastest breakfast of your life. You toss the eggs on the pan…
Why Assumptions About Others Aren’t Worth It
Don’t make assumptions about people. This is advice we hear all the time. In his book The Four Agreements, Don Miguel Ruiz provides four lessons (agreements) for life, one of which is to never make assumptions about anything. Ruiz spends a quarter of his book (yes a quarter) disowning assumptions and explains how they are…
Why You Can’t Remember What Others Can
Imagine you’re speaking with a longtime friend you haven’t seen in years. During the conversation, you bring up a memorable road trip the two of you took along with a group of friends. Your friend looks puzzled and admits she has no recollection of the trip. You think: “Is she serious right now?”. How could…
How to Make Better Decisions
Imagine you’re out to lunch and you’re deciding between a fresh salad or a juicy burger. Part of you wants to order the salad for health reasons, while the other part of you wants to devour the juicy burger. When the waiter comes over to take your order, what do you do? Your decision is…
The Secret to Laziness
At one point or another we’ve all been lazy. We’re tempted to half-ass work projects, household chores, and class assignments. Even the hardest working people have days they feel like giving less than their best. We may think we’re taking advantage of a situation by slacking on work. The problem is we don’t always consider…
Letting Go Of Sentimental Items
Throughout our lives we acquire things that over time create sentimental value. Perhaps you have an item that has a memory attached to it. That item could sit in your closet, basement, or garage. You no longer use this item, but the thought of giving it away gives you anxiety. We must ask ourselves, how…
Proactivity Over Reactivity
We hear all the time to be proactive with our lives. It’s great to say we’ll tackle our days in a proactive manner. The problem is we live in a world that doesn’t always conspire the way we hope it does. We must ask ourselves, “how do we stay proactive when we’re pulled in a…
How to Explain Anything to Anybody
Have you ever been tasked with explaining a complex or highly detailed idea to another person? Imagine your close friend inexplicably says “I’ve never seen Star Wars, what’s it about?”. First of all, why hasn’t your friend seen Star Wars? That’s a separate matter which must be addressed offline. The real question is how do…
Being Funny vs. Having a Sense of Humor
The world we live in is filled with hardships. Every one of us faces unique struggles catered to our lives. Amid all of this, one of the most common pieces of advice is to not take life too seriously and learn to laugh at ourselves. Some may interject with “I’m not funny – how am…
The Four Pillars of Life
People say life is all about having a healthy work-life balance. The concept of a work-life balance is incomplete. Life cannot simply be broken down as time spent working and time spent outside of work. Our lives are much more intertwined and deserve a bit more complexity. Instead of analyzing life as two entities (work…
Productive Solitary Confinement
Much emphasis is put on things we shouldn’t do throughout our days. Don’t watch TV. Don’t mindlessly scroll through Instagram. Don’t eat fast food. Don’t watch cat videos. Don’t check your email every ten minutes. We have to say no to so many things because we live in a world of endless possibilities. Our possibilities…
Finding The Root Of Your Pain
Life consists of pain. This is a universal experience for all humans. Pain can be experienced physically throughout our body as well as mentally or emotionally within our minds. Naturally when we experience pain, we’re quick to pinpoint the issue. The fact we assess pain quickly is a good thing. It means we desire to…
Having Your Own Standards
In 2015, Stephen Colbert was the Wake Forest University graduation commencement speaker. He stressed the importance to have your own standards. I love this mentality because it pushes us to consider what standards to hold ourselves to. Sometimes standards imply the bear minimum, in which case it’s beneficial to hold a standard beyond what’s expected.…
Appreciating The Best Of People
One of my all time favorite quotes is from the transcendentalist poet Ralph Waldo Emerson. He famously said: “In my walks, every man I meet is my superior in some way, and in that I learn from him” I love this quote (with the exception of male bias) because it explains that no matter who…
Building Your Habit String
In his book The Power of Habit, Charles Duhigg discusses how to build a habit. He breaks habits down by including three components, which include the cue, the action, and the reward. The cue serves as a reminder to perform a habit. The action is the actual habit performed. Finally the reward is the feeling…
Arranging your Smartphone Apps
Over the last 10+ years smartphones have become an integral part of our lives. This technological innovation has become extremely polarizing. Smartphones allow for unlimited productivity and possibility in the palm of our hands. Conversely, smartphones can be a massive distraction and can negatively impact our general well being. One thing we can all agree…
3 Issues With The Slogan “Better Than Yesterday”
Every year I come up with a slogan to live by. At the stroke of midnight on New Year’s I’ll put on a wristband with the slogan I’ve selected. The chosen slogan for 2020 was Better Than Yesterday. I chose this slogan because I liked the message of constant self improvement from the day before.…
Optimal Time Blocking
When you set out to complete a list of tasks, it’s advisable to delegate a specific time of day to devote to each task. This is widely known as the practice of time blocking. There are plenty of resources that discuss the importance of time blocking. What doesn’t get discussed as much is deciding when…
Exchanging Problems
Let’s follow the short tale of Richard and his five problems. We begin as Richard is seeking a job. At this point he’s unemployed and can barely pay his rent (Problem #1). Finally after months of searching Richard lands a job. Though he can pay his rent, Richard finds his job unfulfilling and dreads going…
The Problem With New Years Resolutions
We’re approaching that time of year when people begin chirping about New Years resolutions. Typically a resolution is a personal goal you set for yourself that you’ll religiously do every day in the coming calendar year. As we all know, resolutions are more of a joke since it seems more times than not, people don’t…
How To Clear Your Mind
What separates humans from other living creatures is our capacity for higher level thinking. While it’s great we have powerful minds, it can also be our worst enemy. Everyday our minds jump from thought to thought. This can be detrimental to our well-being. It prevents us from living in the present, whether that’s enjoying the…
Post-Decision Bias
Everyday we are faced with decisions. Once a decision has been made we live with the results. When reflecting we tend to categorize previous choices as the right decision or the wrong decision. There’s a problem with this. With many decisions, we can never definitively say whether it was the right or wrong one. Let…
Appreciating The Anticipation
One of the most overused expressions is the following: “the journey matters more than the destination”. Don’t get me wrong I wholeheartedly believe in this principle. The problem is it’s been thrown around so much, to the point it has become somewhat of a cliché. It wasn’t until I read the following passage from the…
Urgent vs. Important
From time to time I’ll highlight a specific point made in a book I’ve read in the past. The book The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey is an all-time classic. I believe the best point made in that book is understanding the difference between tasks that are urgent versus those that are…
4 Reasons To Clean Your Room
During your youth, it’s likely at some point you were expected to clean your room. Usually we do it because somebody told us to do so, and not because we wanted to (with some exceptions). Through these experiences, many of us have associated tidying our rooms as a chore that’s done just for the sake…
Hierarchy of Conversation
“Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people”Eleanor Roosevelt Ever wonder why in some instances a conversation is incredibly engaging and at other times you just want to punch the person talking? Why some conversations seem absurdly dry while others have you entranced, wondering where the time went? Typically when speaking with…
3 Life Lessons From Dogs
Every year people spend millions of dollars seeking the answers to life. We attend seminars, read books, and listen to every podcast. What we are seeking is happiness, success, and fulfillment. Being bombarded by different theories and programs can get extremely overwhelming, especially in this day and age in which many of us suffer from…
3 Steps To Make The Perfect To-Do List
At one point or another you’ve likely created a to-do list. You may have done this the night before or the morning of the day you wanted to complete a set of objectives. What you might not realize is there’s a clearer way to complete your objectives in a more efficient manner. For the sake…
Maximize in Minutes, Not Hours
People always complain there is never enough time in a day. I get it. There are too many errands to run, too many meetings to attend, and too many shows to watch. You have 10 tasks and by the time you’ve completed five the day is almost over. And that’s assuming you don’t waste time!…
How To Read A Book
Based on the title you may be thinking, “is this blog supposed to be for my 3-year-old son?” In actuality this post is for anybody that plans to read at least one more book in their lifetime. While most educated people can read at a high level, it’s surprising how few people read the right…
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About Life Tweak
Welcome to Life Tweak! I provide life advice that’s simple and to the point. Whether you’re seeking healthier life perspectives, increased productivity, or greater communication skills, you’ve come to the right place.
Life Tweak 